Diagnosis: “After traveling for three months on the Big Trip, I went back home for two weeks to spend the Christmas holidays with my family. When I told them prior to the Big Trip that I was going to quit my job and travel until the holidays, the general feedback and reaction was that they didn’t think it was such a good idea.

So when I told them again that I was planning on traveling for two more months, their reactions were worse. My father didn’t even talk to me for one whole day. I was already feeling so low because I didn’t want to leave with them mad at me. After a few talks and explaining, I was able to get their approval. Not that it would ever stop me if they said no. And so I traveled again. There were days when I wanted to go back home, their words had such a big impact on me.

I began to doubt again the decision I made along with the fact that in a few months I was going back home unemployed and with depleted funds. These thoughts distracted me for weeks. Until I made it to Nong Khiaw, a remote river village in Northern Laos. There I witnessed how simple life can be. How people live their lives on a day-to-day basis. How beautiful the landscape is – limestone formations outlined the river. And how genuinely nice the people were.

And then I knew that these were the reasons why I traveled and why I quit the job that was taking over my life. I made the most out of the remaining two months of my trip, I told myself that there was no point in worrying about the future. I was happy living on the road and I’ve never felt more alive. And I realized that my happiness should never be defined by other people.”

 

“It was almost midnight when my train arrived in Chiang Mai, and I was feeling anxious. It’s been months since the last time I was there. I remember it also being cold back then. A good friend picked me up from the station. As we made our way to the Old Town on a motorbike, I remembered the last time I was there with the ex-boyfriend. I saw the benches we sat on, the park where we spent an hour just relaxing. I remembered how happy I was with him. The last time I traveled was with him.

I was back on the road again because I was feeling hopeless, I guess that’s what heartbreak does to you sometimes. What made it worse was the fact that we were supposed to be traveling again by that time. Days passed and I felt more hopeless. I was surprised to realize that I was still hoping that he was there with me. And I despised the realization that the pain I was feeling had been associated with traveling. Traveling used to be the one thing that made me so happy, and sometimes a form of escape. But it wasn’t anymore.

Traveling felt like a trap, magnifying the emotions that I wanted so much to escape from. “Do you believe that someday it’s not going to feel like this anymore?” I remember being asked this question by my friend over drinks. All I can say was “I don’t know. All I know is that every day I’m hoping that tomorrow it’s going to be better.””

Treatment: “The next day we went to see the Yee Peng Floating Lantern Festival. I witnessed the most magical, surreal and beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life. Thousands of glowing lanterns filled with prayers and hopes slowly floated up to the sky. I was mesmerized. I looked out into the beautiful night sky and realized that it was indeed better.

Traveling surprised me again especially when I opened myself up to new experiences. That night I was surrounded by people hopeful and I was looking at one of the most beautiful sights I’ve ever seen. And I felt thankful for all that has happened. If not for them, I would not have been there. I wouldn’t have experienced that beautiful and magical moment. I continued on traveling again for another month in Burma and Thailand. And every day was better than they had ever been in the last six months. I gained new friends, I saw beautiful landscapes and people, and I was happy traveling on my own again. For the first time in months, I felt hopeful.”

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